Category Archives: finding joy

Small steps to wellbeing

 

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Over the last few weeks, I have had many conversations with friends and colleagues about adult wellbeing. Within early years it has been high on the agenda again with a report form Preschool learning alliance showing that 1 in 4 people in the sector is considering leaving due to high stress.

Through conversations over these last few weeks, I have been reminded how hearing about wellbeing and knowing about the need for good wellbeing can sometimes feel very overwhelming if we are in a place of high stress and despair. I am beginning to wonder if actually, all the talk of having high stress and the need to have good wellbeing can sometimes lead us to feel inadequate and more stressed. I have heard speakers and read many articles where we are being told that we need to look after our mental health, we need to talk about feeling stressed, however sometimes all the ideas and solutions can also feel overwhelming,

Over the last few weeks, I spoke at Preschool learning alliance conference and on a podcast for Early Years TV with Kathy Brodie ( this will be out in a few months). My main reflection on both of these is that is ok to take small steps to well-being. Sometimes we can feel too overwhelmed to try the many different ideas, but if we can put one thing in place each day, this is making a small step towards improving things. I often encourage people to do each day one thing which makes them feel happy, this might be going for walk, reading a book, sitting in the garden for 5 minutes with a cup of tea. It will be different for everyone, but finding one thing each day which makes you happy, which helps you to smile, this won’t solve all your wellbeing issues but it is taking a small step towards a change.

For me swimming and wild swimming makes me smile, it helps me to feel alive and joyful and makes me feel really happy.

You can find more ideas for staff wellbeing in my book Promoting Emotional wellbeing for early years staff

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Be kind to yourself this bank holiday weekend.

 

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For those who work in schools or term time early years settings, we are part way through term 5. I always think of term 5 as being an easier term, with my nurture work the children are usually in a good place, they are more settled; often by now the school and children have reached a point of understanding one another. The children often feel safer and happier. But this term hasn’t quite been the usual pattern for a whole variety of reasons. This term I and some of the staff I work with are counting down the days to the next break. For this reason, the bank holiday Monday is a joy!. Don’t get me wrong, I love my job, I wouldn’t change it for any other, it brings me so much delight and hope and satisfaction, but this term I am feeling tired.

The question I often write about and put to others is what can you do that will make you happy? and the extra day that the bank holiday brings us is a perfect time to think about this. It doesn’t have to be big, expensive things. Early this morning I walked around the community meadow, I often do this on a Sunday morning, but this morning I walked barefoot, through the morning dew. By walking barefoot it forces you to slow down, it connects you with the earth, you notice more, you become mindful. The coldness of the morning dew was at first a slight shock, but it soon became really enjoyable. By the end of the walk I felt so happy, the endorphins had really kicked in, in the way I feel when I swim, particularly when I swim outside.

I know from experience putting in place small things that make you feel good, that bring you joy, these really help us to look after our wellbeing.

For more ideas on looking after you well-being look at my book Promoting emotional wellbeing in early years staff.

Finding what brings you joy

 

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In my nurture work, it’s the start of a new term, after a badly needed Easter break. The nurture consultant role can be an emotionally challenging job and one in which you need to be fully present to the children and staff. Holidays are a vital time to take some time to replenish. Over the last two weeks, I decided to spend a lot of my time reading. The books I have read have all been around wild swimming, perseverance, finding silence and the joy of nature ( Find a way, one untamed and courageous life:Diana Nyad, The Salt Path, Raynor Winn, The Moth snowstorm: Nature and joy -Michael McCarthy and Silence in the age of noise- Erling Kagge).

At the start of the holiday, I was feeling fraught, stressed and edgy, I was aware I was catastrophising more than I usually do. The term hadn’t been particularly challenging but I was feeling less able to deal with the usual challenges. Looking back on my choice of books I can see how my body and soul were craving to read and experience things that I know are good for me. I have spent two years writing about wellbeing for children and adults. I know the things that help my wellbeing, but looking back over the last term I can see I hadn’t been doing them enough.

Going into this new term I am planning ways I can incorporate more time outside and exploring nature with the children, using mindful and listening walks with them. I have been thinking again about how I best experience silence, which I know I need every day; being outside, gardening and swimming are the best ways for me. For this I am thinking about how I can increase these opportunities, I am hoping to do some gardening each week; I already swim ever Monday-Friday, but I am also thinking of ways I can fit in open-air swimming into some weekends and end of the days. In the holidays I did my first open air swim of the year in the Cornish sea, I felt so alive and full of joy, it reminded me of how good I feel when I am combining two loves, swimming and being outside.

Being intentional to stop, slow down and notice what is around us.

 

This weekend I have been having conversations with my husband about wellbeing. There is a joke in our family that he and the girls have lived all my wellbeing stuff, they don’t need to read the books! ( although he has recently started reading it and commented with an air of surprise that it is very good!). Our conversation was around how busy he is, he is a self-employed letter cutter, and has some great jobs with tight deadlines over the next few weeks. He knows what he needs to do, he knows he needs to eat well, exercise, get enough sleep, rest, spend time outside, intentionally do things that make him happy, and take time each day to stop and notice. But knowing something doesn’t mean we always put it into practice. He decided he needs to put it into practice a bit more.

 

During this week I delivered listening to young children training, I now always include staff wellbeing within any training I do. The exercise I got people to do was a noticing exercise, we went outside for 10 minutes, and I challenged them to look around, see what grabbed their attention, notice something which made them smile, maybe something of beauty and to take a photo of it, on their phones. We spend so much time rushing, not noticing, the aim of this exercise is to help people to slow down, for a moment and just notice what is around them. The staff all commented on how helpful they found this exercise.

This morning I went for one of my long walks, I knew I needed some time to encounter silence, I wanted this walk to be a slow, intentional walk, a walk of noticing and I was hopeful I would be able to do some early foraging. It was such a beautiful morning, cold but bright and sunny. I did find early nettles and some early wild garlic. For me the smell of wild garlic is a sure reminder of spring, I love the smell. The joy of foraging is that you need to be very mindful, you have to really look and notice, and be very careful about how your picking and how much your picking. I then came home and made wild garlic soda bread and nettle soup. All good for my wellbeing.

There are more ideas on enhancing wellbeing in my book Promoting emotional wellbeing in early years staff.

 

A year of wild swimming and writing

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I have been looking back over the year and photos I have taken. For me, 2017 was a year of wild swimming and writing. I was fortunate to have 3 books published and I have swum in some amazing places. It has been a year of focusing on wellbeing, through writing about wellbeing, supporting my nurture children to have good wellbeing and trying to continue to learn what I need for good wellbeing.

This year I have swum in rivers, in outdoor pools, the sea and my local pool. My best swims have been off the north beach in Iona, through the Stair Hole arch at Lulworth Cove and Durdle Door and swimming in the river with mini natural jacuzzis in Dartmoor. Swimming, particularly outdoor swimming makes me feel so alive and happy and I know it enhances my wellbeing.

My hope for 2018 is to continue sharing my learning about wellbeing with others, to keep writing books and enhancing the lives of my nurture children. But most of all I hope to swim in some more amazing places in 2018.

Where did you find joy this week?

 

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One of my jobs this week was to proof read the book I have coming out in December ‘ Promoting Emotional Wellbeing in Early Years Staff. I love the whole process of writing a book; I find the subject takes up a lot of my thinking and reflecting time, but once I have finished it I often move on in my thoughts to the next project or just take a break from that level of thinking. When I get to proof read the final edition I am reminded of ideas I had, research I had done, some sections I read remind me of the time I wrote it and the feelings I had at that time. That was my experience this week; one small section talks about experiencing joy, finding joy in our work, in our lives, looking out for joyful moments. As I was writing this section, my close friend, Liz was dying of cancer, so to be honest life didn’t feel very joyful at the time.
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One of the suggestions I make is having a practice of gratefulness, at the end of each day asking two questions what am I grateful for today? and where did I find joy? This is a practice I have tried to embed for a long time. It can be a real challenge when days are truly dreadful it can be really easy to get caught up in the gloom and negativity, but this practice encourages me to find something, even if it was small that I am thankful for and that brought me joy.

This week the main joy for me has been in playing with waterbeads. My daughters describe my job as messy play and telling a child ‘i can see your feeling really sad, I am here for you!– not a bad description of a nurture workers role!. In the nurture work this week I have been introducing my four years to waterbeads. I love this sensory tool as they are messy play without being messy ( I have a few children this year who hate the feel of messy play), through using waterbeads you can bring out lots of language and conversation about feelings, touch, emotions. Most of the children adored these; it was so delightful to see their faces light up, they pulled the most wonderful faces of surprise, delight, and pure joy. Several of the children repeatedly commented while running their hands through the tub; ‘I love this so much, I am so happy’. Even when other moments in the week have been more challenging, remembering the children’s joy has been joyful for me.

 

Finding what brings you joy

 

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It took me a while to figure out what brought me a deep sense of joy, I realised a few years ago it is swimming, especially swimming outside. At the start of this summer, I hoped to have more opportunities to swim outside. Thankfully I have been fortunate to swim in some fantastic places. Swimming in a river with dragon flies in June, swimming in the sea on the Isle of Mull and Iona, swimming in a lovely outdoor pool in an avenue of Beech trees at Ammerdown and then today swimming through the arch at Durdle Door and then also at Stair Hole, Lulworth.

Swimming outside feels quite adventurous, I am not a natural risk taker, but wild swimming gives me a major kick of endorphins, leaving me feeling alive and thankful and a little bit adventurous. I am always a bit concerned that I am not a very strong swimmer; due to a few scary experiences in the sea in the past I am quite cautious and very wary of dangers. However today I realised I am a stronger swimmer than I had thought and spent quite a long time happily swimming around and through the arches, enjoying the sun on the sea, admiring the beautiful rock formation. Clearly, five years of swimming each week day in my local pool have paid off.

So much of my work and focus is on wellbeing, such an important aspect of wellbeing is finding what makes you happy and brings you joy. This final week of the summer holidays I will be pulling together ideas and resources, preparing for the new term and new children, thinking about their individual needs and how to enhance their wellbeing. I feel very thankful to be going into the new term feeling rested and with some great memories of brilliant swims.

 

Photos from North beach Iona (Iain Cotton) and Stair hole, Lulworth